Country Livin'

We had a visitor in our flower/weed bed in front of the house. Andy wanted a better look, so he grabbed the shepherd's crook and scooped the snake up and into the yard. I figure the critter was about five feet long. It was definitely unhappy to have been moved and did a little hissing. After a bit, Andy put the snake back in the flower/weed bed, but it wasn't happy there anymore and wiggled off into the trees. I think it needed to find a nice quiet place to digest all those yummy mice it had bulging in it's tummy.

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It's a good thing farts aren't photographicable. At least not this far south and not in the summer. I heard tale of visible fartage in the cold of winter, and so I think that with enough practice and a bit of luck, a fart could indeed be photographed.



Today we drove down Alleghany Spring Road, a narrow and windy road (which says a lot around here), to go get our most recent craigslist find. We bought half a dozen or so locust posts. They started out being around 16 feet long, but Andy took a chainsaw to them and cut them in half so we could get them in the truck without it tipping over backwards from the weight. Even if they hadn't been so so heavy, they may very well have not made it around some of those curves on the way home.

The original owner of the posts lives on a small farm with about a dozen horses, two small dogs, a doberman, and cranky cat. Anya wasn't real sure of what to make of the dogs, especially the doberman, whose head was above my waist. He was a nice puppy, but I think he scared her a wee little bit. Anya also got to met several of the horses (neighhhhh neiiighhhh!). One of the horses tried to pull my gloves out of my back pocket, one of them nibbled on my finger, and all of them almost sniffed us up into their ginormous noses. Too bad we didn't have the camera.



So what are we gonna do with these posts? They are about 8" x 8". Some of them are going to become Anya's sandbox (whenever we clear out the brush pile that is where I'd like the box to go). The rest are going to be a raised bed, either for my pathetic raspberry patch or for veggies or something somewhere.

We've been working on a lot of projects the last few months. I think a list is in order. We ...

- finished the terracey garden bed behind the house
- planted tomatoes, basil, sage, dill, rosemary, and lavender behind the house
- pruned most of the trees in "the yard"
- planted a fantastic-smelling viburnum by the duck house
- worked on the rock border by the driveway and planted a verbena there
- started to clean up the lilac and spice bush bed on the side of the house, pruned the spice bush but didn't get to the lilac because the rams got loose and wanted to eat me
- have kept "the yard" mowed
- cleaned off the porch and planted and hung some baskets back there to make it feel homey
- deconstructed the big bunny cage and put the bunnies out on the porch until their room is finished
- cleaned out the sun room so Andy has an office area and Anya has an area to bounce balls and run in circles
- got the roof up and a bunch of the trim down on the kitty / plant room
- packed up and moved out a bunch of stuff in Anya's room
- have kept the garden weeded and watered



I think that covers the main things. We have lots of projects for the summer, like putting new gravel on the driveway, getting the septic tank drained, chipping the huge pile of brush, building that sandbox and those raised beds, and finishing the kitty / plant rooms. Anyone who is bored is welcome to come out and do some work.

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I guess we've been watching too much BBC programming. Because for the life of me, I couldn't understand why on the radio yesterday there was an ad for a community class called 'Learn to Shag.'

Beginners or Advanced students welcome!
Fun for the whole family!
You don't need to have a partner!

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This evening on the way down the driveway I got the truck stuck partially in the ditch leading to the creek by the pond when I hit a slick spot on our still-mostly-impassable driveway. Cabol wisely suggested I call our insurance, since we have roadside assistance on our policy. They said they would send someone out. Shortly later the phone rang to inform us of an estimated ETA of 1½ hours.

That's right. We live a half hour or so away from the largest city in this part of Virginia (Roanoke). A half hour from Christiansburg. Fifteen minutes from Floyd. But they sent someone from Fort Chiswell, 68.3 miles away. Gosh, you think the bill will be more than the $50 the insurance covers?

I called back, told them to cancel it. The woman on the phone increduously said '70 miles?!?' twice. I asked her if we could use Bell's in Floyd, and she said that was fine and set it up. He was here in a half hour or so. He got stuck in the driveway on the way up. Eventually he made it. I waited for him by the hay shack. He pulled up. He said, 'Oh, I didn't know it was THIS place.' Perhaps there is a reason the insurance company could only find someone 70 miles away.

But he was able to winch the truck back onto the driveway. Now it's stuck on the driveway, but the snow should mostly melt tomorrow. And it's better than in a ditch.

And I was apparently in such a foul mood after getting stuck that when I approached Sydney (who had escaped from his fence), he meekly turned to the side and let me guide him back to his pen with little fighting

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One day, when the moon is in proper alignment and Anya is bringing in the cash on her paper route, we're going to renovate our kitchen and living room. One major part of the renovation will be putting down hardwood floors. To this end, Andy has been collecting a huge stack of old, nasty-looking barn wood. When he'd bring this wood home, he'd get all excited and make me go look at it, and I'd stare at him and then wave my hands around frantically and exclaim, "YOU PAID MONEY FOR THIS????"

Last weekend he pulled out his planer (plainer? playner? pleignar?) and went to work on the stack. About halfway through, he called me outside to take a look at the new, happy-looking wood, so I would calm down and stop eating so many cookies. I did calm down a bit, which was good because I had no cookies.

Here is the story of the future hardwood floors in pictures:



The boards are still a bit rough and will require some trimming and ripping and more plaeigyning before they become a floor, but that's okay because Anya won't be able to ride a bicycle for a few more years.

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About two weeks ago, I started getting antsy because we hadn't been to Home Depot or Lowes in a while, and I didn't want the folks there to miss us. ("Hello guy at the HD in Roanoke who works in the bathroom department and who knows us well enough to run when he sees us coming!") The weather has been too cold lately to work on the kitty room or pretty much anything outside (with a few 24 hour exceptions), so our next project had to be something indoors. It also had to be something fairly cheap since we are still paying off the kitty room supplies (Yay 0% interest!).

Meet our stairway.



On first glance it may not look that bad, but let me point out some of the features of this "rustic" staircase.

1. The walls are painted white. That's a big demerit point right there.
2. The trim is an unpleasantly-stained pine.
3. The light fixture is one of those cheapo glass cone-like dealies that looks like something Madonna would wear over her bosom. Well, she'd probably wear one over each bosom. We just had one the fixture, though.

Our plan of attack was simple: paint and replace the glass brassiere.

Andy got started with the prep work. He filled in ALL the nail holes in the trim and did some other spackling. He was going to start priming when I happened by.

"Um, Andy. Yeah. That trim is nasty. Is there anything you can do to make it look nicer?"

4. The trim that cuts the stairway in two is all wonky and doesn't match side-to-side and is just plain ugly. It's made up of what appears to be bits of wood left over from other projects and puzzle-pieced in.

I believe Andy glared at me at this point. He didn't see anything really wrong with it and didn't want to try and change it. I admit we were both afraid of what we would find under the wood if we started pulling pieces off. Knowing the folks who built this house, one of those strips of trim probably held the fabric of space and time together.

I was willing to risk annihilating the universe, though, if it meant bringing a little more symmetry into my life. I like symmetry. Symmetry makes me happy. Plus, if the universe was at risk, perhaps the Doctor would come for a visit.



Andy got out the crowbar and I could tell that for a moment he pondered using it to whack me upside the head, but instead he started ripping off that ghastly trim. Luckily, space and time remained unharmed.

After the painting was done on the walls (the trim isn't done yet) and before the scaffolding came down, Andy installed our new light fixture.



No, not that one you see in the picture. He spent about two hours getting that one put up, and then I walked by and said, "Um, yeah. That isn't going to work." Luckily by this time the crowbar was back in the workshop. Hey, was it my fault that this light perfectly aligned to shine naked bulbs right in my eyeballs as I walked past? The second light only took about an hour to put up, I only heard Andy curse a few times. (P.S. We did not paint the walls yellow. The light in that photo is horrible. We used a color called "river reed." It's a pale green with a bit of tan in it.)

Alas, this is where the pictures stop for now. The new trim is in but needs some work (i.e., a few tubes of caulk and a magic wand), and the railing needs to go back up. When all is done I'll get the final photo in. It looks really nice, though. Trust me. And at around $150 it's our cheapest project on this house so far.

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This morning we were sitting on the floor, staring at the newly laid bathroom floor. Cabol pointed out that thinset had filled in between about 3/4 of the spaces between the penny tiles. Everything I read says this isn't really good, since, you know, that's where the grout is supposed to live.

So, this morning I guess we take a trip over to Home Depot and see what they recommend to remove it in a timely fashion. I can sit there with a sharpened nutcracker or nail set and scrape it all out by hand, but I read you can use a dremel tool. All our dremel tool attachments, however, are a little too wide, so maybe I can find something smaller at the store. Or I'll have a long week ahead of me.

Cabol was also nice enough to point out that even though I tried to be as anal as possible about putting the sheets down in the right position, I managed to flip one of them 180°. So the little black tiles have a 1' square section where they are all wonky.

In the middle of the floor.

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I had ordered a NAS that was to be delivered on Monday by Fed Ex. But this morning (Saturday), they showed up instead. As someone who ships things at work sometimes, I know Saturday delivery is an extra charge. I expressed my surprise to the Fed Ex lady, and she said Fedex Home Delivery doesn't deliver on Mondays(!) but does on Saturdays.

I wonder if that is a benefit of living in the boonies - things only get delivered on certain days, but they are days when you are actually home!

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Things have been slow on the bathroom front. Partially because being sick threw me all off, and partially because I'm a lazy bum. Last weekend, I put the rest of the wainscoating up on the walls, and painted it. I also cut the Wonderboard™ and set it on the floor so we wouldn't keep stepping on sticky wood. I also repaired the floor around the drain.

Tonight I mixed up a bucket of thinset and set the Wonderboard™ on the plywood floor and screwed it in. Tomorrow I should get the tile laid, and maybe by Sunday night we'll have a toilet again. And the door needs to be shaved down, or we'll be without one and you'll be able to watch people pee.

On a slightly related note, when I was back in NY awhile back cleaning out my dad's place, my Uncle David took me over to my grandfather's place to see if there was anything I wanted to take back with me. While entertaining me with stories behind various tools, he would also say things like 'Do you have one of these? No? You really should. You'll need it.' I politely nodded and agreed, wondering when I would.

The nice wood chisels? Used at least a dozen times.

The extra jig saw? Awfully handy when I wanted one in the shop and one in the bathroom.

But the 1/2" drill I thought I'd rarely use since I have a whole cabinet of drills? When I had to mix a pail full of thinset and my 'heavy duty' Delta drill started to smoke, it was priceless.

(I have, however, yet to find a use for the giant pipe wrench. Yet.)

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Friday morning bright and early, I headed out to a blueberry farm owned by a guy who works in my department and his honey, who taught one of the classes for my Master Gardener training. I went with my friend and her son and my boss and her family. (Did you know fresh blueberries are sort of green on the inside...kinda like grapes?) After about five minutes, boss's kid was ready to go. After about half an hour, friend's kid was ready to go. Too bad, so sad! I ended up with about three pounds of berries. Made some blueberry pancakes yesterday. Yrm. Anya liked them, too.



While I was out frolicking through the berry field, Andy was at home hard at work...sleeping. He did wake up eventually, though, and chiseled the yicky, sticky vinyl floor tiles out of the bathroom. (Notice the rotten wood to the left and the nice pretty wall to the right.)



He started complaining about his legs hurting, but he figured it was from sitting on the floor for so long. He finished cleaning up the floor, went to Lowes for plywood to repair the floor, and returned home and proceeded to work on a nice little fever complete with body aches and a desire to barf. He's been sick ever since.

Someone please tell me why he couldn't have gotten sick BEFORE he took the toilet and sink out of the nice bathroom?

This morning while I was out feeding animals, I spied some nice, ripe black raspberries. I picked some but was kept from many by the poison ivy. Maybe this evening I'll suit up and steer the lawn mower into that living barrier. Or, maybe I'll get a sledge hammer and smash up a wall in the bathroom. Or maybe I'll just take a nap.

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